Growing up in a New Jersey suburb with a large Chinese American population, I was always taught that there is one key to success in America: hard work. The Chinese immigrants in my community were proof positive that the American Dream was real and that with hard work you could get anywhere. Many of them, including my parents, had come to the US with almost nothing. They struggled through graduate programs on scholarships or TA-ships or odd jobs, started from the bottom rungs of corporate ladders, furnished their own clinics and advertised their own private practices. With hard work, they graduated, received promotions, and amassed clients and patients. They told me these stories so I would remember how lucky I was to be growing up in a beautiful town with everything I could possibly want, and so I would remember that I, too, had a duty to work hard and carry their success forward.
My mother’s bone to pick was not really with my sexuality. What made her mad was my sodden public image rubbing off on her. Losing face in the Chinese community is a slow death spread by word of mouth. Her main complaint was that she would never be able to post wedding photos if there were two brides. Her over-achieving daughter that once was on track to making her proud became nothing but a ghost on her online trail.
We’re starting “The WeChat Project”—a partnership with Chinese American where we’ll be releasing new articles about conversations we want to start. Given the moment we find ourselves in, these articles will begin with topics like police brutality or mass incarceration, but will eventually include topics like mental health, queer identity, and educational achievement.
我叫黄艾琳（Eileen Huang）， 是耶鲁大学英语系大三学生。PBS的最新纪录片《亚裔美国人》播出以后，有人约我就美国华裔历史写一篇观后感，或者写一首诗也行。可是，我发现在这个时候很难作诗。我不想只关注我自己族裔的历史和故事，而不去了解和认识所有被边缘化的少数族群经历的挑战，痛苦和创伤（其中也包括我们自己族裔的遭遇），哪怕是在今天。鉴于明尼苏达州的抗议活动是由白人警官和亚裔警官谋杀黑人乔治·弗洛伊德（George Floyd）引发的（编者注：Derek Chauvin已被当地检察官以三级谋杀和二级杀人罪起诉），我特别想谈谈亚裔美国人社区中盛行的对非裔的歧视和敌视态度。如果我们不认真反省，这种态度会给我们所有人招来暴力。
My name is Eileen Huang, and I am a junior at Yale University studying English. I was asked to write a reflection, maybe even a poem, on Chinese American history after watching Asian Americans, the new documentary on PBS. However, I find it hard to write poems at a time like this. I refuse to focus on our history, our stories, and our people without acknowledging the challenges, pain, and trauma experienced by marginalized people—ourselves included—even today. In light of protests in Minnesota, which were sparked by the murder of George Floyd at the hands of racist White and Asian police officers, I specifically want to address the rampant anti-Blackness in the Asian American community that, if unchecked, can bring violence to us all.
为此，我们和同学们携手创办“心声”栏目——与《美国华人》微信公众号及其网站合作（The WeChat Project )， 我们将定期发表文章，开启我们渴望已久的两代人之间的对话。考虑到我们正处于特殊时刻，初期，我们会讨论诸如警察暴行或大规模监禁之类的话题，以这些热议的话题为开端，以后还会跟大家一起探讨跟我们切身相关的心理健康、性少数群体、教育成就等话题。文章在《美国华人》发表的同时，每周也会以电子邮件的形式发送。